Are you overwhelmed by all the tasks and responsibilities on your plate? Are you being pulled in too many directions at once? Do you feel the pressure of constantly increasing demands on your time? Are you working hard but not getting anywhere, like you’re running on a hamster wheel? If the answer is no, feel free to skip this post. But if this sounds like you, then I hereby give you permission – nay, I implore you – to Be Lazy and Selfish™.
But Caroline, you might protest, why would you ever recommend that? Isn’t being lazy and selfish a BAD thing?
I’m using these terms because if you’ve gotten stuck on a hamster wheel, you may fear that the advice I'm about to give you would make you lazy and selfish. Of course, it won’t really do that. I use “lazy” and “selfish” in a tongue-in-cheek way to describe how you can simultaneously perform better and increase your satisfaction. Think about it as one way to work smarter, not harder. Being lazy means to do less, but also to be strategic and intentional about how you spend your time, which is also part of being selfish - prioritize yourself and your needs. With that, my dear hamsters, here is a list of practices you can try to incorporate into your life. Think of it as a menu, not a checklist, though I have personally found all of these to be useful.
Do Less
The first thing to do is take stock of where you can do fewer things. Start by considering all the activities and tasks that fill your day and ask yourself the following questions:
What could you do more efficiently? Are there tasks that you could automate, or cut out excessive steps? For example, if you are still mailing checks to pay your bills, set up auto pay. Or if you have a task at work that you must do on a regular basis, how can you avoid repeating the steps every time
What could you do less of, or less perfectly? If it takes you a long time to complete your tasks, it’s possible that you are aiming for perfection. But according to the 80-20 rule or Pareto principle, 80% of your output takes about 20% of the input or effort, and that last 20% of output takes 80% of your effort. In other words, you can get to good pretty quickly, and in many cases, that is sufficient. Learn to recognize those instances and stop before you spend too much time trying to achieve perfection.
I’m practicing this principle every week with my blog. I will admit that I have perfectionist tendencies, but I’ve learned that done is better than perfect. So I accept that there may be minor errors here and there, and that I could keep wordsmithing for days, but it’s more important to publish something that is good enough and then move on with my life.
What can you outsource? This could mean paying someone to do it for you, or delegating. Start with the things that you enjoy the least - for me, it’s cleaning the house. There are plenty of great housekeepers out there. This summer we are planning a trip to a country we’ve never been to, and I didn’t want to spend hours to research hotels, airfare, and sights. I found a travel agent (yes, they still exist) who put together an amazing itinerary based on our interests and preference for a small fee.
Then consider things that you have mastered already. Who could you delegate the task to, creating a win-win situation where they can learn something new and potentially improve the process by looking at it with a fresh perspective. Or perhaps you have children who complain about being bored - what household chores could you assign to them?
What could you stop doing? Consider what you’re doing today that no longer serves its original purpose. Maybe it started out of necessity, but things have changed and you just kept going out of habit. For example, are there recurring meetings at work that are no longer useful? Cancel them, or at least consider reducing the frequency?
Rest and Recover
Being busy and productive and getting lots of things done can be addictive. I get it. I love creating a list of tasks and the oh-so-satisfying feeling of checking the boxes off one by one. But if you’re constantly on the go without breaks, I can guarantee you’re not performing at your optimum level. And if you’re anything like me, you might have pretty good endurance but at the end of the day you are just exhausted. I’ve had times when I finished a major effort and felt physically ill once I let myself take a breather.
There’s plenty of research that supports the importance of recovery when it comes to exercise and athletic performance. The same is true for mental performance. If you are trying to simultaneously process too much information at once, you risk cognitive overload. Taking breaks is important not only to rest your mind so you can be more productive, but also so you can create the space to be more creative. I don’t get my best ideas and insights by thinking harder. I often find that if I let a problem or idea sit for a while, it seems to process in my unconscious mind and I’ll find inspiration while i’m trying to sleep (not ideal) or while I’m working out or doing yoga in the morning (i.e., getting out of my head). So make sure you include enough time in your day to be idle or do something recreational.
Ask, What’s In it For Me (WIFM)?
Here’s where I’m going to ask you to put yourself first. Or at least don’t put yourself last after everyone else. Whatever it is you’re spending your time and energy on - are you able to answer the question, What’s in it for me? There are plenty of good answers to that question. Sometimes it will be easy - you are doing something that you are passionate about and genuinely enjoy. Sometimes it’s not something you love to do, but you should still be getting something out of it - learning an important new skill, working on a project that will help you to advance in your career, helping someone important to you, financial benefits, etc.
But if you have trouble identifying what’s in it for you, stop saying yes to those things. I’ll say it again - stop saying yes to things you don’t want to do that don’t give you anything. Save your time for activities that are more worthwhile. Stop putting everyone else’s needs before your own. And important to all of the above is knowing what it is that you value, what you want. When you know what that is, let people know, and ask for it. Advocate for yourself. I spent way too much time thinking that as long as I did good work, I would get the rewards that I deserve and that they would be fair. But how should I expect anyone to know what matters to me unless I tell them?
It’s likely that the idea of adopting some of these practices makes you uncomfortable, because they require changing your mindset and habits. Just remember that’s a perfectly normal feeling, and over time you will get more comfortable as you reap the benefits of being Lazy and Selfish like me.
Just for fun: who remembers the Hampster Dance?
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